Pony Gold Whiskey Visions sample shirt; Volcom button-up; Somedays Lovin’ jeans via Market HQ; Urge boots via Market HQ; jewellery/scarf/conchos: markets/eBay.

So we went to the op-shop, and I bought this good rug. I also found a book about – inexplicably, really – the original 90210 television series. So then that got me thinking about my favourite episodes, including but not limited to: the one where Dylan goes to Mexico because his sister was kidnapped, the one where the gang goes to Palm Springs and I think Brandon has a drinking problem or something, and the one where Brandon’s crazy girlfriend drugs him and his killer ivory Mustang convertible gets trashed – ending in the inevitable egg-assisted “this is your brain on drugs” metaphor. Oh, and any one where Steve wears a fluro crop top, because that just makes no sense. 

But anyway, most of all, the best bit was when Dylan McKay quoted what would later become my favourite Bukowski poem. Although, I only recognised that retrospectively, because at the time that it aired I was, say, five. 

But that was some cool shit, the Bukowski thing. Because Beverly Hills 90210 was about as mainstream and marketed as you can get – my 11 year old sister had 90210 socks – but I love that there was something kinda culturally seditious slipped in there, that you could take or leave. A bit of an unturned stone. 

Is that still going on? Are today’s characters in entertainment still doing that at all – working on two levels: the accessible and the enlightening? Giving us a little lane-end into new words, music, or art to discover? I have my doubts, and I try not to look at them anyway.

So, we went to the op-shop and I bought this good rug, and Humble and I laid on it in the sun and I thought about those kinda things. 

there's a bluebird in my heart that

wants to get out

but I'm too tough for him,

I say, stay in there, I'm not going

to let anybody see

you.

Welcome to my sketchbook for August/September... I think it was worth the killer neck strain and weird attachment to characters in CSI/Law and Order: SVU ... that I've developed after too many weekends committed to drawing with subliminal background-noise TV on. 

Going to try and get that obsessive-compulsive behaviour on a leash and head back out into the real world soon... 

And thanks everyone for your crazy, incredible support and love! It seriously amps up my obsessive-compulsive need-to-draw days, in the best possible way. Whinge though I may about workloads, I really love being part of such a supportive and creative community. 

It's somethin' else.

I recently spent a whole afternoon catatonic on the couch, staring blankly at old episodes of CSI and scrolling mindlessly through Pinterest. Fully tuned-out and dropped-out. No brain noise at all. The afternoon then segued into drinking vodka-orange-and-pineapple with my housemate in the backyard, while our partners barbecued some stuff and we talked about UFOs, weird people we knew, and the environment. I think that afternoon on the couch marks the official peak of my burn-out and collapse into kind-of desperately directionless watching/scrolling/drinking and denial of all the – constructive – things I was supposed to be doing.

So, I’ve been a bit quiet on here lately, mainly due to the kind-of burn-out experience. But I’m still here, and this is a bit of what I’ve been doing (list adapted from Meet me at Mike’s)…

Making: Plans. Always.

Cooking: Pear and parmesan salad, anything vaguely Mexican

Drinking: Alternating between whiskey+dry and tea

Reading: Recently, Tom Robbins's Fierce Invalids Home from Hot Climates and Tim Winton's The Turning, and just started Jonathon Franzen's Freedom

Wanting: This and this from Spell, Optical Intrusion jeans from Evil Twin, and this from Rejoice the Hands. 

Looking: Through the archives of my favourite artist of the moment Aminah Slor’s blog

Listening: To Pandora -- Lynyrd Skynyrd and Led Zeppelin stations

Wasting: Beautiful days and evenings, by sitting inside working on sketches.

Wishing: I didn't have to live in a city with no immediately viable options for swimming in natural bodies of water.

Enjoying: Waking up at 5am to chip away at to-do lists – mornings are my peak action time.
Growing: A lettuce garden and some mint. I’m really pleased that Humble hasn’t dug them up.

Watching: Documentaries on Pink Floyd and giant squid – not in the same one, unfortunately – CSI marathons and the highlights of the NRL finals.

Waiting: For a chance to escape and hit the road

Following: The constant stream of inspiration and motivation that comes out of the online creative community.

Liking: Every little new-campaign teaser Sugarhigh and Lovestoned are posting online.

Collecting: Biological specimens to press in sketchbooks, inspiration from natural sculptures and oddities to add to drawings.

Wondering: What I should do next.

Loving: My partner. And my dog, the Princess Weenie Mutt. And scones.

Missing: My family and my home. A lot.
Hoping: That our rented house doesn’t sell. Or if it does, that we find a way cooler place to live, where we can still have fires and puppy parties.

Marvelling: At spring in Melbourne, and how this city's awful/crazy weather makes you incredibly grateful for a day of solid sunshine.

Needing: More time

Smelling: Stolen jasmine flowers, toasting sourdough

Wearing: Black jeans and Harley boots (always), boyfriend’s black shirt that I bleach-dyed and screen-printed, and loads of silver and turquoise. Usually also some bright green and yellow hand-knitted house socks my housemate’s mum gave me.

Noticing: The ebb-and-flow of creative drive and burn-out, tolerance and rage, triumph and defeat. And that women, especially and sometimes inexplicably, can be very mean to one another.

Knowing: Way more about Adobe Illustrator than I did last week.

Thinking: About buying big canvases and starting some paintings.

Giggling: At Humble's attempts to be brave/sneaky/a human
Feeling: Cautiously optimistic